Retire In Peace, Terry Glenn

So this is how it ends. Terry Glenn has not had a sparkling career by any stretch of the imagination, but I bet he didn't plan on it ending like this. I remember reading about his decision to have surgery on that knee last year. I still don't know what the hell is wrong. From what I understand he had the opportunity to have a quick-fix surgery and be back in time for the Cowboys Super Bowl run (fat chance if you asked me) or he could do it right and get the (I think) microfracture surgery that guys like Greg Oden and Amare Stoudamire underwent. I think the recovery on this is about 16-18 months as opposed to the 6 months of an ACL tear. My buddy had to do the microfracture thing, and that's what he told me, so I'm pretty much an expert.

Anyway, they told Terry that if he did the quick-fix he would not be able to walk without a distinct limp as early as his 50's. I won't say I prayed for him not to do the quick fix - there are bigger things worth praying about - but I was really hoping he'd consider his future quality of life. Well he didn't. That, or he didn't care. Either way he came back and did absolutely nothing for the Cowboys in their playoff loss to the Giants, probably made his knee worse, will still be mostly crippled and nobody will care. That's right, Terry. I guess you haven't heard about the Gridiron Greats. They're lead by Mike Ditka and nobody cares about them either.

Welcome to the real world, Terry. It's cold and it sucks.

More on Wangs

I've always thought the road Wang ZhiZhi jersey would be the way to go if I decided to support a particular NBA player. Of course, I would never do this. Those guys get guaranteed contracts and, therefore, don't need my support. I wish I could get an NBA contract. Just one of 'em. For the minimum. Do you know what I could do with $442,114? I could supply a year's worth of water to 442,114 Africans. I could buy 294,743 giant-size slurpees. Hell, you could probably get a low-quality snuff film made for that amount of money. The possibilities are near endless. I'd probably end up blowing it on something worthless though... like paying off debt or 14 masters degrees.

Your Fantasy First Round

I've been dying for Yahoo! to open their leagues since finally winning the championship in my most competitive league last year. I'm more than a bit of nerd when it comes to fantasy football. Last year I ranked 200 players, including some defenders. It took the better part of a month, but paid nice dividends. If you want some pedigree, here are my finishes in the last 4 seasons:

2007-1st
2007-2nd
2006-2nd
2006-3rd
2005-3rd
2005-4th
2004-2nd
2004-2nd

With that out of the way, the following is my initial first round mock draft, assuming a 10 player league. Enjoy:

1. LaDainian Tomlinson
A picture of consistency. I value players based on how consistently they put up the same numbers. A homerun hitter is nice, but I would much rather be able to count on 15 points every week than worry about a goose egg in the lineup. LT is the master, only missing 1 game in his career. He turns 29 today, so next year I will be looking at a younger guy for the 1st overall pick.

2. Adrian Peterson
AP's 2007 numbers are hard to ignore. He had the most explosive rookie season ever. There is a great chance that he will be the #1 RB when this season is said and done. There's an equally great chance that he's injured in week 3. Personally, I'd love to have a guy like this on my team, but I hate having so much risk attached to the #2 pick of the draft. If your league's free agency is shallow, handcuff Chester Taylor in round 6 or 7.

3. Steven Jackson
Jackson had a tough time last year. Orlando Pace and Marc Bulger were both hurt, which is pretty bad, but so many other O-linemen got hurt that I think they were starting my brother at center by the end of the year. Look for Steven Jackson to rebound this year. Losing Isaac Bruce won't affect his production at all.

4. Brian Westbrook
You probably read his name and think "injury-prone". Believe it or not, he's strung together a couple of healthy seasons. Westbrook's all-purpose yardage makes him tremendously valuable. If you're in a league with point-per-reception, he might be unparalleled. Draft him and don't look back.

5. Joseph Addai
Honestly, Addai let me down a little bit last year. I thought he was poised to have a bigger season. His TD's increased, but his numbers were mostly the same otherwise. Perhaps this was partially a result of losing Marvin Harrison. I don't know. I like his odds again this year despite the signing of Dominic Rhodes, who will not be as big a factor as he was during their Super Bowl year.

6. Tom Brady
If you're the guy in this position, don't take Brady. The point discrepancy between QB's in most leagues is not large enough to merit a 1st round selection. You'd rather be the guy with top-notch RB's and WR's and then draft a Palmer, Anderson or Bulger in later rounds. Somebody is going to look at Brady's outrageous numbers from last year and take him high though. Maybe higher than this. Let them do it.

7. Randy Moss
On average, one WR goes in the 1st round of every draft. This year it's Moss. It's hard to argue with the selection, but I'd rather try to wait and take a guy who isn't known to have hamstring problems.

8. Peyton Manning
Peyton is Mr. Consistent at the QB position. See my comments above on QB's, but look for Manning to have another good year. If Marvin Harrison can stay healthy, and out of jail, look for Manning's numbers to increase. It also helps that Anthony Gonzalez has a year under the belt.

9. Larry Johnson
This could go two ways. The Chiefs hope to start 10 of their 12 rookies, including an O-lineman, so that should tell you something about the quality of their team. Johnson could very well have a nice comeback from his piss-poor 2007, but since I don't like the guy I'd rather predict that he somehow loses the job to Jamaal Charles. Regardless, getting a 2007, consensus top 3 pick in the 9 spot is not a bad deal.

10. Marion Barber
I was a little unsure here, but I think Barber gets the nod. The Cowboys are the best they've been in years and Marion the Barbarion is the TD machine in this offense. He probably won't put up considerably more yardage than last year, but his touches and touchdowns should be enough to make him worth drafting 10th.

A Bad Day for Rihanna

I know the white, middle-class male does not care about soccer. You probably rate your sports something like this:

1a. Football (either Pro or College)
1b. Football (the other one)
2. Basketball
3. Baseball
4. Hockey
5. Golf
6. Nascar
7. MMA
8. Women's Sand Volleyball
9. Olympic Games
10. Soccer of any kind.

However, I do know that there are a couple common factors that cause most of you to rank sports in this way. Lots of scoring (or threats to score) and the athletic, black man. Thusly, I find it appropriate to comment on yesterday's 8-0, American drubbing of Barbados.

I was a little nervous right up until kickoff. Looking at 11 athletic, black men on the other side of the field is a little intimidating. Clint Dempsey took care of those worries, though, by scoring the fastest goal in World Cup Qualifier history (53 seconds). It's incredible that a country about the size of Corpus Christi, TX can field a soccer team to line up across from us. We're not, historically, a soccer powerhouse or anything, but we did enter the last World Cup ranked in the top 10.

Poor Barbados. By the end of this fiasco their defense seemed to have totally given up. Scoring goals on themselves, standing around yelling at each other while Landon Donovan takes a free kick right into an open net and even letting Brian Ching get in on the action. Trust me, nobody named Ching has ever been a soccer god. This game was the biggest blowout in the US men's national team history. At one point the announcers said that Barbados "would be happy" to leave the game with a mere 3-0 loss. I originally scoffed at this notion, but if you'd told them the 3-0 loss was taking the place of an 8-0 humiliation, I bet they'd have signed whatever papers you shoved in front of them.

Watch the highlights here. Let's face it, that's all any of you care about anyway.